A little thought on Pesach, the holiday of our freedom, which is coming up shortly, and the Passover cleaning that I at least dread starting!
Why do we use diamonds on engagement and wedding bands? There is the well known idea that marriage is to “polish your diamond” and that a marriage should be unbreakable, symbolic of the fact that nothing can cut a diamond besides another diamond. I would like to posit another idea: diamonds are judged not only by their size, but also by their clarity. The best diamond is one that has no opaqueness and no blemishes. When you look at such a diamond, the beauty is in the tremendous dazzle of the clear white reflecting in so many colors around the room.
This is our souls. The Gemara says that Sara and Esther were among the most beautiful women who lived, because the beauty and purity of their souls shone through their bodies – and we see this in terms of the radiant faces of tzaddikim as well. However, sin causes the soul to be increasingly opaque and concealed within our bodies. The more blemishes and opaqueness, the less the radiance of the soul can shine through the gray and black muck. The white purity of our inner diamond can be so obscured that, much like a raw diamond, you might mistake it for a sooty rock and never dream that it is capable of being so exquisitely beautiful!
In the secular world, shmutz is commonplace, accepted, and everywhere. The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition, Maxim, advertising, the girls that cheer for every sports team – you name it. The hard core stuff is just as numerous, a centimeter below the surface. A secular person might even laugh and say: What’s the big deal?
But in a Torah home, this has no place. Kedushah and impurity simply don’t mix – it’s like oil and water. We are supposed to be a light unto the nations, and commanded by Hashem to be an am kadosh – a holy nation. There can be no brachah and hatzlachah in a house, and certainly no shalom bayis, without kedushah. It’s not punishment; it’s simple spiritual consequences.
We have to look deep into our own souls and clean not only our physical spaces of chametz – of the ego and shmutz that we think is so acceptable most of the time – but also our spiritual “spaces.” We need to dust ourselves off, even more than the cabinets! The energy of the month of Nissan which is coming up shortly is all about breaking free of boundaries, of making gigantic spiritual leaps – symbolized by the deer, which is the symbol of the month.
Right now, we are in Mitzrayim – in a closed, tight space. The situation is Eretz Yisrael seems to be getting tighter by the day, especially in light of the various attacks that have happened in recent weeks (reported by Mystical Paths and other blogs). There is no “natural” solution to this problem, and I think it is no coincidence that these events are happening now, as opposed to during a different time of the calendar.
We just celebrated Purim, which took place in what is now modern day Iran. Once again, a powerful Iranian/Persian evil man is threatening to eradicate the Jews, and is funding and training all the terrorist activities in Gaza/West Bank/Lebanon.
Hopefully, we just “cleaned up” our physical act through the mitzvot of Purim – sanctifying our money through giving charity, our food by having the Purim seudah, and our mitzvot bein adam l’chaveiro – between us and our fellow Jews – by exchanging gifts. Now, we need to clean up our spiritual act in preparation for Passover. The diamond is there – but it is so covered in rock that even the diamond has forgotten its essence. Bezrat Hashem, by doing teshuva and living in a way that keeps our diamond sparkling, we can merit the yeshua - tremendous, miraculous salvation, that we so desperately need – both in the land of Israel, and for the people of Israel.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Monday, January 28, 2008
Emuna from the Depths
I had the most amazing revelation during hisbodedut this morning. I have been fighting tooth and nail to maintain the upperhand against the Yetzer and depression, and fighting a losing battle. I was overwhelmed with this sad, overwhelmed, pained feeling. My heart was blocked. I tried to talk to Hashem, but all that came out were various scenarios of how shocked people will be when they hear the news. Despite my best efforts to smile, despair and hopelessness were setting in. I was miserable.
Then I found a fantastic parking spot by the train, all the more meaningful since it will help me get home faster and easier for Shabbat. I said “thank you Hashem, Hashem loves me!” And it hit me like a lightning bolt – “HELLO!!! Hashem LOVES me! He’s doing this for my best, even if it’s painful!!! Why are you sad? Why haven’t you been using the lesson you learned in ‘Hashem Loves You’?”
Then I realized: emuna isn't only for when things are good. You have to be happy even – especially – in times of crisis. I had been giving myself a bit of a pass, thinking “I'm trying to be happy. H’ understands if I just can't do it – it’s too hard. This crisis is just too hard. Everyone understands that I'm miserable right now.”
Of course that’s not true. This situation is a test for me too – will I have emuna through it? Will I fall apart? In fact, why on earth WOULD he do teshuva when he’s got me angry, sullen, depressed and bitter all the time? Has pounding someone into teshuva ever worked? Where the heck is my emuna? Maybe it’s my emuna that’s going to turn this thing around in the first place – it all depends on me! Moreover, is there some sort of heter in the Torah that says that you can be mean and criticize someone just because he’s done something really terrible to you and you're hurt and angry? I've felt justified in doing so – mistakenly.
In fact, I've been depressed as if the verdict had already come down. OK, I'm being a realist – but has H’ ever worked by “realism”? If so, the Jewish people would be long gone and many of the miracles I have seen in my own life wouldn’t have happened – because by the natural course of the world, they “shouldn’t” have happened. So why not here? Again, where’s your emuna?
So I pulled out my Tikkun Klali and started saying Tehillim – not with a broken, crushed and depressed spirit, but with joy and emuna in my heart. And these words popped out at me from Tehillim Mem Beis (the translation may not be exact, but these are the words I said to myself from the Hebrew):
“Ma tishtochachi nafshi? U’ma tehemi alai? Hochili l’Elokim! Ki od odeinu yeshuot panai v’Elokai.”
Why are you saddened, my soul? And why do you feel downtrodden and walked all over? Hope to Hashem! Because you will continue to thank Him for the miraculous salvations He brings you, and He is my G-d.
I repeated it over and over again and tried to get it to sink in. After I was done with Tikkun Klali, I said Tehillim 20, 23, 121 and 143, my personal emuna favorites. And then I sang in my head songs from those Tehillim as I walked to work and I feel much better. B’H” it’s going to be a good day! The biggest thing is that the heaviness on my heart is gone. Now my biggest prayer is that I can keep this up.
Then I found a fantastic parking spot by the train, all the more meaningful since it will help me get home faster and easier for Shabbat. I said “thank you Hashem, Hashem loves me!” And it hit me like a lightning bolt – “HELLO!!! Hashem LOVES me! He’s doing this for my best, even if it’s painful!!! Why are you sad? Why haven’t you been using the lesson you learned in ‘Hashem Loves You’?”
Then I realized: emuna isn't only for when things are good. You have to be happy even – especially – in times of crisis. I had been giving myself a bit of a pass, thinking “I'm trying to be happy. H’ understands if I just can't do it – it’s too hard. This crisis is just too hard. Everyone understands that I'm miserable right now.”
Of course that’s not true. This situation is a test for me too – will I have emuna through it? Will I fall apart? In fact, why on earth WOULD he do teshuva when he’s got me angry, sullen, depressed and bitter all the time? Has pounding someone into teshuva ever worked? Where the heck is my emuna? Maybe it’s my emuna that’s going to turn this thing around in the first place – it all depends on me! Moreover, is there some sort of heter in the Torah that says that you can be mean and criticize someone just because he’s done something really terrible to you and you're hurt and angry? I've felt justified in doing so – mistakenly.
In fact, I've been depressed as if the verdict had already come down. OK, I'm being a realist – but has H’ ever worked by “realism”? If so, the Jewish people would be long gone and many of the miracles I have seen in my own life wouldn’t have happened – because by the natural course of the world, they “shouldn’t” have happened. So why not here? Again, where’s your emuna?
So I pulled out my Tikkun Klali and started saying Tehillim – not with a broken, crushed and depressed spirit, but with joy and emuna in my heart. And these words popped out at me from Tehillim Mem Beis (the translation may not be exact, but these are the words I said to myself from the Hebrew):
“Ma tishtochachi nafshi? U’ma tehemi alai? Hochili l’Elokim! Ki od odeinu yeshuot panai v’Elokai.”
Why are you saddened, my soul? And why do you feel downtrodden and walked all over? Hope to Hashem! Because you will continue to thank Him for the miraculous salvations He brings you, and He is my G-d.
I repeated it over and over again and tried to get it to sink in. After I was done with Tikkun Klali, I said Tehillim 20, 23, 121 and 143, my personal emuna favorites. And then I sang in my head songs from those Tehillim as I walked to work and I feel much better. B’H” it’s going to be a good day! The biggest thing is that the heaviness on my heart is gone. Now my biggest prayer is that I can keep this up.
Monday, January 21, 2008
Worth Referencing
Arut7
13 Shevat 5768, 1/20/2008
Coincidence, or Message From G-d?
by Tamar Yonah
It seems like this is just too uncanny that these are all 'coincidences'. On January 8, 2008 the day that President Bush left the USA for Israel in order to lay the framework for the establishment of a Palestinian State and the division of Jerusalem for its capital , a freak 'January' tornado swept through a city in Bush's own country. The place hit was 'Jerusalem', Arkansas. Coincidence?
One church was totally destroyed in the tornado’s path. The name of it was “Mt. Zion” Community Church. Coincidence?
One man was killed in the tornado. He was a ‘Pope’ County resident. His name, was Billy Carter.
On Sunday of last week, I read out a report about this 'freak tornado' which hit Jerusalem, Arkansas. (Tovia Singer spoke about the tornado on his show after mine, on Wednesday) I was emailed by a few people last week to write on the tornado, but I didn’t have time to do it until now. So, let’s examine some interesting ‘coincidences’ here.
1) A tornado in the month of JANUARY?
2) This tornado hits a city called ‘Jerusalem’.
3) It destroys a church called, ‘Mt. Zion’.
4) Hits in a place called ‘Pope’ County
All this on the day Bush leaves for Israel to wage war on G-d by going against the Bible and dividing the Land of Israel.
The very next day, Thursday January 9th, another calamity strikes America. As Israel experiences a very heavy and unusual heavy fog during Bush’s visit, central Florida gets hit with a freak heavy fog. A mega 70 car accident takes place. The worst highway disaster in Florida’s history. What is interesting here is the number 70. A neighbor of mine whom I often give a lift to, was waiting at the gas station near where Bush’s entourage passed on its way to Ramallah. The roads were closed down and he was stuck waiting and watching. He saw Bush’s entourage pass by. He counted 70 cars.
70 cars driving with Bush to Ramallah in heavy fog, and 70 cars in a horrible accident in Florida under heavy fog. Coincidence?
Let me remind you again what I wrote in a blog on the significance of the number 70 that we keep seeing in the news these last few weeks. The number 70 is the number of nations that met in Paris, France, to raise billions of dollars to create a viable (enemy) Palestinian State. 70 is the number that the letters Gog and Magog add up to. Gog and Magog is the war of the Nations of the world who come against Jerusalem and Israel. And the nations of the world, numbers 70 according to the Bible as explained in the story of the Tower of Babel where G-d mixes up the people with 70 languages, who then disperse to become 70 different nations.
Is all of this JUST a coincidence?
Thursday, January 17, 2008
How Do We Endure?
The story explained by Mystical Paths in Israel has been pretty scary. US armed forces following buses bringing kids to school, police with bats being rough with kids daring to play in the streets of Geula, more rockets in Sderot – and Bush offering a Palestinian state with East Jerusalem as its capital as reward for their terrorism. It sure seems like no one cares about the safety of Jews in their own land – but put Bush’s safety in jeopardy and the entire country shuts down (with of course no care again given to the Jews affected). How do we endure this suffering?
The same way that our ancestors did in Egypt – infallible belief that HASHEM CARES, we WILL be redeemed, and they will pay for every OUNCE of our suffering!
This redemption is supposed to mimic the redemption from Egypt. Here’s one big similarity:
In Egypt, we were supposed to spend a specific number of years in slavery. However, the Egyptians reveled in their power over us, and subjected us to much more severe suffering than had been ordained – and they were made to suffer, middah k’neged middah, for both enjoying giving us the suffering we were supposed to get, and making us suffer even more (and we were redeemed early).
Now, it is the same thing. We have paid twice the suffering allotted, and the goyim have indeed – and continue to – revel in the continued suffering they inflict on Jews. It feels never ending, and so, so unfair. The double standard is so blatant, and yet no matter how much we protest, write letters to the White House, our representatives, and the media, it just doesn’t change. It’s because they don’t want to listen. They don’t want to hear the truth. They continuously choose to harden their hearts against us.
Just remember that they don’t run the show – Hashem does. No matter how much they fight against His people, no matter what they try to do to erase us and everything we stand for off the map, whether they do so using Katyushas or “peace” treaties and politics – they will not succeed. They will become just like the Egyptians, who were wiped off the map and weren’t heard from again for hundreds of years, and in truth, never really recovered even half of what they had been previously. “Hashem ish milchamah” – Hashem is a Man of war. It is not the IDF that fights our battles, nor the Israeli government that it is our spokesman, but Hakadosh Baruch Hu Himself.
“There is an Ear that hears, and an Eye that sees, and everything is written in the Book, and the signature of each man is transcribed therein.” When the Day of Judgment comes, the goyim that were against us will fight the verdict, but lo and behold, it will be their own signature. They will get their due and we will rejoice – not for sweet revenge, but in celebration of Justice and the fulfillment of His word. Amen!
Link to Mystical Paths Post: http://mysticalpaths.blogspot.com/2008/01/well-this-explains-lot-or-not.html
The same way that our ancestors did in Egypt – infallible belief that HASHEM CARES, we WILL be redeemed, and they will pay for every OUNCE of our suffering!
This redemption is supposed to mimic the redemption from Egypt. Here’s one big similarity:
In Egypt, we were supposed to spend a specific number of years in slavery. However, the Egyptians reveled in their power over us, and subjected us to much more severe suffering than had been ordained – and they were made to suffer, middah k’neged middah, for both enjoying giving us the suffering we were supposed to get, and making us suffer even more (and we were redeemed early).
Now, it is the same thing. We have paid twice the suffering allotted, and the goyim have indeed – and continue to – revel in the continued suffering they inflict on Jews. It feels never ending, and so, so unfair. The double standard is so blatant, and yet no matter how much we protest, write letters to the White House, our representatives, and the media, it just doesn’t change. It’s because they don’t want to listen. They don’t want to hear the truth. They continuously choose to harden their hearts against us.
Just remember that they don’t run the show – Hashem does. No matter how much they fight against His people, no matter what they try to do to erase us and everything we stand for off the map, whether they do so using Katyushas or “peace” treaties and politics – they will not succeed. They will become just like the Egyptians, who were wiped off the map and weren’t heard from again for hundreds of years, and in truth, never really recovered even half of what they had been previously. “Hashem ish milchamah” – Hashem is a Man of war. It is not the IDF that fights our battles, nor the Israeli government that it is our spokesman, but Hakadosh Baruch Hu Himself.
“There is an Ear that hears, and an Eye that sees, and everything is written in the Book, and the signature of each man is transcribed therein.” When the Day of Judgment comes, the goyim that were against us will fight the verdict, but lo and behold, it will be their own signature. They will get their due and we will rejoice – not for sweet revenge, but in celebration of Justice and the fulfillment of His word. Amen!
Link to Mystical Paths Post: http://mysticalpaths.blogspot.com/2008/01/well-this-explains-lot-or-not.html
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Reality Check: Comparisons between Iraq and Israel
I would like to comment on the amazing "coincidence" that is happening in the Middle East, specifically designed by G-d to make us wake up:
1. In Israel, there is a Green Line separating Israel from the Palestinian Arabs, designed to safeguard Jews
a. In Iraq, there is a Green Line separating the Americans from the Arabs, designed to safeguard Americans.
2. Israel is faced with recurrent suicide bombers who try to kill civilians any which way – in markets, on the roads, buses, etc.
a. America is faced with recurrent suicide bombers who try to kill soldiers any which way – in markets, on the roads, car bombs, etc.
3. Due to the insurgence of terror, Israel must operate checkpoints to be able to monitor people and items coming in and out of the border. These are contested and many people complain about them, saying that they are an affront to the rights of the Arabs.
a. Due to the insurgence of terror, America must operate checkpoints to be able to monitor people and items coming in and out of Iraq/the border/different safe zones. Where are the human rights people now?
4. Granted the severe situation, Israel finds itself in a quandary, faced with a seemingly endless situation with opponents who don't fight fair and won't talk – or talks, and lies. Many people say that Israel should leave (cease to exist/give up more Israeli land).
a. Granted the severe situation America finds itself in a quandary, faced with a seemingly endless situation with opponents who don't fight fair and won't talk – or talks, and lies. Many people say that America should leave.
I am sure that there are many more similarities that I can't think of right now. Do we learn? Does America/the Western World stop limiting and fighting Israel's right to defend itself, even as they are forced to take the exact same measures to protect themselves? Even more so – America is trying to protect soldiersand Israel is trying to protect civilians who shouldn't be in the war in the first place. Should the civilians not have at least as many, if not more, safeguards than soldiers?
We are living in a time of great illusion, where truth is twisted and everything is backwards. And still, no one wants to look, they just want to say "Get outa my face." America – and many Israelis for that matter - just want the situation to "go away" and are not listening to the Arab who is cursing them with death in the meantime.
The situation isn't going away, because both parties have to want it. In reality, one party has told us numerous times what it wants – a world without Jews, and a world without Americans/Christianity/the West either, and they are happy to kill us and themselves to get it. We have to be willing and able to fight to the death to meet the challenge, and we're too stuffed with materialism and excess to want to do anything besides retreat to our nice little beachside second home in La-La Land.
1. In Israel, there is a Green Line separating Israel from the Palestinian Arabs, designed to safeguard Jews
a. In Iraq, there is a Green Line separating the Americans from the Arabs, designed to safeguard Americans.
2. Israel is faced with recurrent suicide bombers who try to kill civilians any which way – in markets, on the roads, buses, etc.
a. America is faced with recurrent suicide bombers who try to kill soldiers any which way – in markets, on the roads, car bombs, etc.
3. Due to the insurgence of terror, Israel must operate checkpoints to be able to monitor people and items coming in and out of the border. These are contested and many people complain about them, saying that they are an affront to the rights of the Arabs.
a. Due to the insurgence of terror, America must operate checkpoints to be able to monitor people and items coming in and out of Iraq/the border/different safe zones. Where are the human rights people now?
4. Granted the severe situation, Israel finds itself in a quandary, faced with a seemingly endless situation with opponents who don't fight fair and won't talk – or talks, and lies. Many people say that Israel should leave (cease to exist/give up more Israeli land).
a. Granted the severe situation America finds itself in a quandary, faced with a seemingly endless situation with opponents who don't fight fair and won't talk – or talks, and lies. Many people say that America should leave.
I am sure that there are many more similarities that I can't think of right now. Do we learn? Does America/the Western World stop limiting and fighting Israel's right to defend itself, even as they are forced to take the exact same measures to protect themselves? Even more so – America is trying to protect soldiersand Israel is trying to protect civilians who shouldn't be in the war in the first place. Should the civilians not have at least as many, if not more, safeguards than soldiers?
We are living in a time of great illusion, where truth is twisted and everything is backwards. And still, no one wants to look, they just want to say "Get outa my face." America – and many Israelis for that matter - just want the situation to "go away" and are not listening to the Arab who is cursing them with death in the meantime.
The situation isn't going away, because both parties have to want it. In reality, one party has told us numerous times what it wants – a world without Jews, and a world without Americans/Christianity/the West either, and they are happy to kill us and themselves to get it. We have to be willing and able to fight to the death to meet the challenge, and we're too stuffed with materialism and excess to want to do anything besides retreat to our nice little beachside second home in La-La Land.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Be Wary
Sat-Sun-Mon before Annapolis (Thanksgiving weekend): Strong earthquakes in Japan, Indonesia and India
Thurs before Annapolis: 2 medium earthquakes in Jerusalem (actually I only saw one reported - possible one and aftershock), 7.4 (REALLY BIG) earthquake in the Caribbean Islands just off Martinique (most popular island?) and Fort-of-France and another medium earthquake in Chile.
The world is not on solid footing. I would be interested to see stats of probability of earthquakes in all those places at once, granted that they're on different plates. Interesting though that America and Europe were not hit with natural disasters.
Even more: June 15 a press release was given stating that the Old City of Jerusalem and the Al-Aksa Mosque in particular are in danger of severe collapse if there is a strong earthquake in Jerusalem, which the city is supposedly overdue for. This is especially because these areas are built on rubble as opposed to rock.
The prophets say that before Moshiach comes, there will be a great earthquake in Israel, and "every wall shall fall, and the mountains shall be laid bare." Nice way to get rid of that disgusting dome, Hashem, that rests on stolen land. Very clever.
Thurs before Annapolis: 2 medium earthquakes in Jerusalem (actually I only saw one reported - possible one and aftershock), 7.4 (REALLY BIG) earthquake in the Caribbean Islands just off Martinique (most popular island?) and Fort-of-France and another medium earthquake in Chile.
The world is not on solid footing. I would be interested to see stats of probability of earthquakes in all those places at once, granted that they're on different plates. Interesting though that America and Europe were not hit with natural disasters.
Even more: June 15 a press release was given stating that the Old City of Jerusalem and the Al-Aksa Mosque in particular are in danger of severe collapse if there is a strong earthquake in Jerusalem, which the city is supposedly overdue for. This is especially because these areas are built on rubble as opposed to rock.
The prophets say that before Moshiach comes, there will be a great earthquake in Israel, and "every wall shall fall, and the mountains shall be laid bare." Nice way to get rid of that disgusting dome, Hashem, that rests on stolen land. Very clever.
Friday, March 24, 2006
Real Faith
Sorry for the long lull in posts, I got married... :-)
Speaking of which, it taught me an important lesson about faith.
YOU HAVE TO KNOW IT WILL WORK OUT IN THE END.
The problem is, in the middle, it doesn’t always look hunky dory. The evil is still out there, it’s still floating around, it’s still running amuck, and it’s still affecting me. People die, G-d forbid. Little kids get sick. Families are torn apart. This world isn’t tearing at the seams – it’s bleeding at the seams.
And everything is supposed to be alright? I'm supposed to walk around like the world is a garden and everything’s beautiful? We’re supposed to skip off into the sunset saying “G-d will take care of me, no worries” as the road crumbles underneath us? That’s not faith, that’s folly! That’s the blindness G-d has been trying to remove, trying to get us to see the evil that’s there and grapple with it instead of just ignoring it and saying – it’s good, it’s good. It’s NOT good and we have to deal with that. G-d is probably tired of saving us from ourselves saying “it’ll be alright, G-d will save me.”
But how do you hold the two things together, and how do you know what to DO?
So fine, G-d is good, and all He does is good, and…we still have needs that aren’t met. We need jobs, we need money to pay rent, we need food, we need safety. We still only have so much energy and so much time. G-d is good up in His heavens, and He knows our hearts, and He loves us, and…we still need what we need!
That’s where faith comes in to tie the two things together. Yes, we need whatever we need, and right now, it’s actually good and it will be good once we get to the end of the story. Faith is what gets you through to the end of the story, when we see that all of the evil we thought was actually, inexplicably and yet understandably, good.
Knowing that, then we get to work to fight the evil we do see and try to fill the needs we do have, because believing it will eventually be good doesn’t mean we don’t have to do our part to try and make it good NOW.
Speaking of which, it taught me an important lesson about faith.
YOU HAVE TO KNOW IT WILL WORK OUT IN THE END.
The problem is, in the middle, it doesn’t always look hunky dory. The evil is still out there, it’s still floating around, it’s still running amuck, and it’s still affecting me. People die, G-d forbid. Little kids get sick. Families are torn apart. This world isn’t tearing at the seams – it’s bleeding at the seams.
And everything is supposed to be alright? I'm supposed to walk around like the world is a garden and everything’s beautiful? We’re supposed to skip off into the sunset saying “G-d will take care of me, no worries” as the road crumbles underneath us? That’s not faith, that’s folly! That’s the blindness G-d has been trying to remove, trying to get us to see the evil that’s there and grapple with it instead of just ignoring it and saying – it’s good, it’s good. It’s NOT good and we have to deal with that. G-d is probably tired of saving us from ourselves saying “it’ll be alright, G-d will save me.”
But how do you hold the two things together, and how do you know what to DO?
So fine, G-d is good, and all He does is good, and…we still have needs that aren’t met. We need jobs, we need money to pay rent, we need food, we need safety. We still only have so much energy and so much time. G-d is good up in His heavens, and He knows our hearts, and He loves us, and…we still need what we need!
That’s where faith comes in to tie the two things together. Yes, we need whatever we need, and right now, it’s actually good and it will be good once we get to the end of the story. Faith is what gets you through to the end of the story, when we see that all of the evil we thought was actually, inexplicably and yet understandably, good.
Knowing that, then we get to work to fight the evil we do see and try to fill the needs we do have, because believing it will eventually be good doesn’t mean we don’t have to do our part to try and make it good NOW.
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Preparation is Everything
The Sfas Emes remarks on his commentary on the Chumash that “the preparation for a mitzvah can take ‘l’olam’ – forever.” I think the Sfas Emes is saying that while the performance of a mitzvah is “1,2, 3, gamarnu (done)!” one can spend their entire life working on having the right kavannah (intention) and preparing the mitzvah so it is done more and more perfectly.
Moreover, it is imperative to understand that the kavannah is everything. Although in most cases it is better to do a mitzvah without kavannah (in the hope you will eventually have the kavannah) than to not do the mitzvah at all, there is one exception: when the kavannah you have is negative. That is, if you do the mitzvah grudgingly, if you are not happy and excited to do the mitzvah, it is not counted as a mitzvah.
Let me give an example. Suppose a wife gets sick in the middle of the night, and after some hours of trying to go back to sleep, realizes that she must have a certain medication in order to go back to sleep.
Scenario #1: her husband, although tired and groggy, dutifully gets up, runs to the local drug store, and comes home with his prized possession. He portions out the medicine for her with a glass of water, and they go back to sleep together.
Scenario #2: her husband loudly complains about how tired and groggy he is. He gets up, runs to the local drug store, and comes home with the medication. He hands her the bottle, practically throws a glass of water at her, and goes to sleep. She takes the medicine and falls asleep sometime later.
The husband got her the medication in the middle of the night in both scenarios. The difference was his kavannah, what he was thinking as he performed the mitzvah. But, you say, there were other differences too! The whole WAY he got her the medicine was different! Exactly. It is exceedingly difficult to perform a mitzvah perfectly without the correct intention, because you simply won't be engrossed in the mitzvah enough to understand the details of what need to be done. Therefore, the more perfect the kavannah, the more perfect the mitzvah itself will be.
Let’s take this further. Imagine the difference in the wife’s reaction to each scenario. In Scenario #1, she is probably able to fall asleep not only because of the medication, but also because of the wonderful manner in which her husband acted. The mitzvah brought her and her husband closer. In Scenario #2, she is probably angry. “After everything I do for him,” she thinks, “he can't do a thing for me when I need it! I would have gone myself if I knew he was going to act this way.” Her frustration probably makes it harder to fall asleep and prolongs her pain, as she lies looking at her “insensitive” husband sleeping peacefully once more.
Does the mitzvah have the same reward in each case? Certainly not. While his wife has the medicine in Scenario #2, she is not happy about it, it does not increase the affection she has for her husband, and it actually distances them further.
The same is true when we do mitzvot. Mitzvot are meant to perfect us and bring us closer to Hashem. When we do them b’simchah, with joy, this is certainly achieved, and Hashem rewards us accordingly. However, when we do mitzvoth in the manner of the husband in Scenario #2, not only do we not get the reward for the mitzvah, Hashem is angry with us, just like the wife is angry at her husband, even though he did get up and get the medicine.
This also explains the verse in the Torah: “these curses shall come upon you because you did not serve the Lord your G-d with joy.” When mitzvot are not done with joy and gladness, with a happy heart that is glad to be able to make Hashem “happy” (Scenario #1), then not only are we not blessed, we are cursed!
Therefore, as the Sfas Emes remarks, we must strive l’olam, forever, to constantly perfect our kavannah and do mitzvot with increasing joy. And in turn, the more we perfect the kavannah, the more perfect the mitzvah itself will be done as well.
Moreover, it is imperative to understand that the kavannah is everything. Although in most cases it is better to do a mitzvah without kavannah (in the hope you will eventually have the kavannah) than to not do the mitzvah at all, there is one exception: when the kavannah you have is negative. That is, if you do the mitzvah grudgingly, if you are not happy and excited to do the mitzvah, it is not counted as a mitzvah.
Let me give an example. Suppose a wife gets sick in the middle of the night, and after some hours of trying to go back to sleep, realizes that she must have a certain medication in order to go back to sleep.
Scenario #1: her husband, although tired and groggy, dutifully gets up, runs to the local drug store, and comes home with his prized possession. He portions out the medicine for her with a glass of water, and they go back to sleep together.
Scenario #2: her husband loudly complains about how tired and groggy he is. He gets up, runs to the local drug store, and comes home with the medication. He hands her the bottle, practically throws a glass of water at her, and goes to sleep. She takes the medicine and falls asleep sometime later.
The husband got her the medication in the middle of the night in both scenarios. The difference was his kavannah, what he was thinking as he performed the mitzvah. But, you say, there were other differences too! The whole WAY he got her the medicine was different! Exactly. It is exceedingly difficult to perform a mitzvah perfectly without the correct intention, because you simply won't be engrossed in the mitzvah enough to understand the details of what need to be done. Therefore, the more perfect the kavannah, the more perfect the mitzvah itself will be.
Let’s take this further. Imagine the difference in the wife’s reaction to each scenario. In Scenario #1, she is probably able to fall asleep not only because of the medication, but also because of the wonderful manner in which her husband acted. The mitzvah brought her and her husband closer. In Scenario #2, she is probably angry. “After everything I do for him,” she thinks, “he can't do a thing for me when I need it! I would have gone myself if I knew he was going to act this way.” Her frustration probably makes it harder to fall asleep and prolongs her pain, as she lies looking at her “insensitive” husband sleeping peacefully once more.
Does the mitzvah have the same reward in each case? Certainly not. While his wife has the medicine in Scenario #2, she is not happy about it, it does not increase the affection she has for her husband, and it actually distances them further.
The same is true when we do mitzvot. Mitzvot are meant to perfect us and bring us closer to Hashem. When we do them b’simchah, with joy, this is certainly achieved, and Hashem rewards us accordingly. However, when we do mitzvoth in the manner of the husband in Scenario #2, not only do we not get the reward for the mitzvah, Hashem is angry with us, just like the wife is angry at her husband, even though he did get up and get the medicine.
This also explains the verse in the Torah: “these curses shall come upon you because you did not serve the Lord your G-d with joy.” When mitzvot are not done with joy and gladness, with a happy heart that is glad to be able to make Hashem “happy” (Scenario #1), then not only are we not blessed, we are cursed!
Therefore, as the Sfas Emes remarks, we must strive l’olam, forever, to constantly perfect our kavannah and do mitzvot with increasing joy. And in turn, the more we perfect the kavannah, the more perfect the mitzvah itself will be done as well.
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
Baseball Rules; Rabbi Rules
This year’s World Series, and indeed a number of White Sox games that led them to the World Series, beautifully illustrates a very difficult Jewish concept. In fact, this concept is something I continue to struggle with in my understanding of Yiddishkeit.
There is this interesting concept that “Torah lo bashamayim hi” – the Torah is no longer in Heaven. As illustrated in a fascinating Gemara where Rabbi Eliezer “proves” through miracles and even a Bat Kol, a “voice from Heaven,” that his ruling is correct, the ruling goes in favor of the majority. Why? The Torah is not in Heaven anymore.
But if Rabbi Eliezer was correct, if his ruling was the ruling accepted in Heaven, as proven by the Bat Kol saying that this is so, then how could we actually poskin (rule) in a different way? Why does it matter that the majority didn’t agree, even when the majority is wrong?
Come back to baseball. There were a number of calls made by umpires that were proven through the hi-tech zoom cameras of the TV station to be incorrect. The correct call, the Truth (if you will) was (although perhaps not easily) clearly shown through the video. However, the incorrect call of the umpires stood.
But how could that be, if the video showed that the umpire was wrong? Why didn’t the call get changed to reflect the reality, the Truth?
The answer is that baseball rules give the umpires the sole discretion to decide the proper call(s) for each play. Although we certainly hope that they get each call right, and usually they do, the game isn’t based as much on Truth as much as each umpire’s truth: what they saw. In effect, the CAMERA wasn’t given the ability to decide; the UMPIRE was given the ability to decide, even if that seems to contradict the camera.
Similarly, when Hashem gave the Torah to the Jews, He put the creation of law into the Jews’ hands, and out of His own. Of course, Hashem also gave Moshe directions on how law was to be made, and one of those directions is: the law shall follow the majority. Just like the umpires “lay down the law” in baseball, whether that seems to match reality or not, so too the Rabbis “lay down the law” following the directions given to them by G-d. Just like one could say that the umpires are shlichim (messengers) of the game to enforce the law the game gives them, so too G-d installed the Rabbis as shlichim of law for the Jews, and they are given full discretion to rule according to the laws and rules G-d gave them.
There is this interesting concept that “Torah lo bashamayim hi” – the Torah is no longer in Heaven. As illustrated in a fascinating Gemara where Rabbi Eliezer “proves” through miracles and even a Bat Kol, a “voice from Heaven,” that his ruling is correct, the ruling goes in favor of the majority. Why? The Torah is not in Heaven anymore.
But if Rabbi Eliezer was correct, if his ruling was the ruling accepted in Heaven, as proven by the Bat Kol saying that this is so, then how could we actually poskin (rule) in a different way? Why does it matter that the majority didn’t agree, even when the majority is wrong?
Come back to baseball. There were a number of calls made by umpires that were proven through the hi-tech zoom cameras of the TV station to be incorrect. The correct call, the Truth (if you will) was (although perhaps not easily) clearly shown through the video. However, the incorrect call of the umpires stood.
But how could that be, if the video showed that the umpire was wrong? Why didn’t the call get changed to reflect the reality, the Truth?
The answer is that baseball rules give the umpires the sole discretion to decide the proper call(s) for each play. Although we certainly hope that they get each call right, and usually they do, the game isn’t based as much on Truth as much as each umpire’s truth: what they saw. In effect, the CAMERA wasn’t given the ability to decide; the UMPIRE was given the ability to decide, even if that seems to contradict the camera.
Similarly, when Hashem gave the Torah to the Jews, He put the creation of law into the Jews’ hands, and out of His own. Of course, Hashem also gave Moshe directions on how law was to be made, and one of those directions is: the law shall follow the majority. Just like the umpires “lay down the law” in baseball, whether that seems to match reality or not, so too the Rabbis “lay down the law” following the directions given to them by G-d. Just like one could say that the umpires are shlichim (messengers) of the game to enforce the law the game gives them, so too G-d installed the Rabbis as shlichim of law for the Jews, and they are given full discretion to rule according to the laws and rules G-d gave them.
Friday, August 05, 2005
Losing the Ikkar for the Toful: Forget the Hat!
Recently, two friends of mine recounted to me the following stories:
The first is directly from a friend of mine for whom it was his father’s yahrzeit. He lead Maariv (Evening Prayers) & Shachris (Morning Prayers) without issues, and then went to a minyan that often needs help getting 10 men for Minchah (Afternoon Prayers). He told the Gabbai of the shul that it was his father’s yahrzeit and that he would like to lead davening. The Gabbai asked him: “How is your Hebrew?” He replied that it was “OK” – certainly good enough to lead davening but no professional either. After some consultation with other members he was told that he could not lead davening. The Rabbi of the shul later explained that the minyan was particular about proper pronunciation and did not feel comfortable with just anyone leading the minyan.
The second comes directly from another friend, who was telling me a story about his father. It seems his father also desired to lead davening for his father’s yahrzeit, but he was in another area of town and unable to daven at his usual shul. He went to a shul near where he was - and was flatly told that he could not lead because was not wearing a black hat – only a standard black yarmulke. He asked if he could borrow someone else’s hat and lead – and again was refused.
These two stories strike a similar chord of discontent in me. Firstly, each of these men had a very specific chiyuv (obligation) to lead davening, usurped only by someone in shivah or shloshim (the first week or 30 days after the death of an immediate family member). As one friend put it, “Does my father’s neshamah matter less than theirs?” Both times, a primary mitzvah was ignored for a preference of some sort.
Where are our priorities? First of all, although under normal circumstances it is better to have someone lead services who can speak Hebrew perfectly, it is not a requirement. The only requirement is that the person leading services pronounce the Hebrew well enough to be understandable and that the Hebrew be basically correct. To my understanding, in the case of my first friend, the shul’s desire to be exacting on a mitzvah actually led to a blatant disregard for halachah! Forget my friend’s feelings as well.
In many ways, though, the second story bothers me more. I’ll never forget, I was speaking with a Rabbi about someone I knew in the beginning stages of learning about Judaism from being outside the fold. I asked him if I should tell this person to wear a kippah. The Rabbi responded “What, that? Certainly not. Don’t bug him about a Rabbinical chumrah. He has much more important things to focus on right now.”
Now, granted that the Temple in Jerusalem was destroyed because of sinas chinam – baseless hatred – I am going to make the assumption that sinas chinam in every form is the most despicable in Hashem’s eyes. Many times I have learned that Hashem will forgive just about any transgression against Him if only we will get along with each other. What the shul did to my friend’s father in the second story is flat out sinas chinam. He had is head covered, there’s no halachah stating such and such black hat is the only proper way to cover one’s head.
Now follow my logic. 1) Hashem hates discord among Jews 2) He will more easily forgive aveiras against Him than sinas chinam 3) A man wearing a head covering is not even directly from the Torah, but Rabbinic (Rabbinic law should still be followed, but it is not held to the same level as Torah law) 4) Jews are constantly fighting about proper headcovering, and stereotyping Jews based upon it – to the extreme of someone not being able to fulfill a mitzvah because he was fulfilling the mitzvah differently than others (and still fulfilling the mitzvah, mind you!) – I would argue that Hashem would rather us burn all of our kippas and stop hating someone because he wears a different type of hat/kippah/whatever than you, than wear the kippah and fight! Keep the orange ones for the time being, it’s a great statement, but I think you get the picture. I’m not saying kippas don’t matter, I'm saying if the kippah (trying to do a mitzvah) leads you to an aveira (sinas chinam) – forget the stupid kippah! “A mitzvah that comes through an aveira is not a mitzvah.”
Practically, I don’t suggest everyone burn their headcoverings immediately. I do think we need to re-think our priorities and what all of our chumras are leading to given the philosophical understanding I just explained. If the chumras lead to good, then fantastic – and if they don’t, maybe we need to reconsider our priorities, maybe something needs to change. The change might only be the way we approach the mitzvah – wearing whatever headcovering we choose and respecting others choices as well, for instance. But try to remember what’s essential and what’s not – and choose accordingly.
The first is directly from a friend of mine for whom it was his father’s yahrzeit. He lead Maariv (Evening Prayers) & Shachris (Morning Prayers) without issues, and then went to a minyan that often needs help getting 10 men for Minchah (Afternoon Prayers). He told the Gabbai of the shul that it was his father’s yahrzeit and that he would like to lead davening. The Gabbai asked him: “How is your Hebrew?” He replied that it was “OK” – certainly good enough to lead davening but no professional either. After some consultation with other members he was told that he could not lead davening. The Rabbi of the shul later explained that the minyan was particular about proper pronunciation and did not feel comfortable with just anyone leading the minyan.
The second comes directly from another friend, who was telling me a story about his father. It seems his father also desired to lead davening for his father’s yahrzeit, but he was in another area of town and unable to daven at his usual shul. He went to a shul near where he was - and was flatly told that he could not lead because was not wearing a black hat – only a standard black yarmulke. He asked if he could borrow someone else’s hat and lead – and again was refused.
These two stories strike a similar chord of discontent in me. Firstly, each of these men had a very specific chiyuv (obligation) to lead davening, usurped only by someone in shivah or shloshim (the first week or 30 days after the death of an immediate family member). As one friend put it, “Does my father’s neshamah matter less than theirs?” Both times, a primary mitzvah was ignored for a preference of some sort.
Where are our priorities? First of all, although under normal circumstances it is better to have someone lead services who can speak Hebrew perfectly, it is not a requirement. The only requirement is that the person leading services pronounce the Hebrew well enough to be understandable and that the Hebrew be basically correct. To my understanding, in the case of my first friend, the shul’s desire to be exacting on a mitzvah actually led to a blatant disregard for halachah! Forget my friend’s feelings as well.
In many ways, though, the second story bothers me more. I’ll never forget, I was speaking with a Rabbi about someone I knew in the beginning stages of learning about Judaism from being outside the fold. I asked him if I should tell this person to wear a kippah. The Rabbi responded “What, that? Certainly not. Don’t bug him about a Rabbinical chumrah. He has much more important things to focus on right now.”
Now, granted that the Temple in Jerusalem was destroyed because of sinas chinam – baseless hatred – I am going to make the assumption that sinas chinam in every form is the most despicable in Hashem’s eyes. Many times I have learned that Hashem will forgive just about any transgression against Him if only we will get along with each other. What the shul did to my friend’s father in the second story is flat out sinas chinam. He had is head covered, there’s no halachah stating such and such black hat is the only proper way to cover one’s head.
Now follow my logic. 1) Hashem hates discord among Jews 2) He will more easily forgive aveiras against Him than sinas chinam 3) A man wearing a head covering is not even directly from the Torah, but Rabbinic (Rabbinic law should still be followed, but it is not held to the same level as Torah law) 4) Jews are constantly fighting about proper headcovering, and stereotyping Jews based upon it – to the extreme of someone not being able to fulfill a mitzvah because he was fulfilling the mitzvah differently than others (and still fulfilling the mitzvah, mind you!) – I would argue that Hashem would rather us burn all of our kippas and stop hating someone because he wears a different type of hat/kippah/whatever than you, than wear the kippah and fight! Keep the orange ones for the time being, it’s a great statement, but I think you get the picture. I’m not saying kippas don’t matter, I'm saying if the kippah (trying to do a mitzvah) leads you to an aveira (sinas chinam) – forget the stupid kippah! “A mitzvah that comes through an aveira is not a mitzvah.”
Practically, I don’t suggest everyone burn their headcoverings immediately. I do think we need to re-think our priorities and what all of our chumras are leading to given the philosophical understanding I just explained. If the chumras lead to good, then fantastic – and if they don’t, maybe we need to reconsider our priorities, maybe something needs to change. The change might only be the way we approach the mitzvah – wearing whatever headcovering we choose and respecting others choices as well, for instance. But try to remember what’s essential and what’s not – and choose accordingly.
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